


Truth or Dare

by Ice_Queen784



Category: The Crown (TV)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Elizabeth doing shady things in search of the truth, F/M, Lies, Marriage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-31
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-12 00:19:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 16,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13535652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ice_Queen784/pseuds/Ice_Queen784
Summary: “Ever since I became queen, I have found myself surrounded by men who lie to me and try to use me. But to uncover the truth, how far dare I go?”





	1. The Games Begin

**Author's Note:**

> Just a fair warning, this will include Elizabeth doing some pretty shady things, including several men that aren’t Philip. Not in this chapter, but it will come later. So if you have a problem with that, you probably shouldn’t read this. But for those who don’t have a problem with that, enjoy! :)

I was awoken in the middle of the night. Philip was returning home, drunk as usual. What had he been doing out all night? What exactly did he do when he went out with Mike? What went on at the Thursday Club?

  
Philip claimed everything was perfectly innocent. But I didn’t believe him. I had to know the truth, but I wasn’t sure how I would get it. Who else could I ask? It wasn’t like I knew anyone else that attended those gatherings.

  
I decided I would confront him in the morning. I doubted it would do much good to try and talk to him when he was drunk. I closed my eyes and pushed my questions from my mind. It wouldn’t do me any good to lose sleep over it.

  
The next morning, he was still sleeping when I woke up. I would talk to him later. I had meetings and such to attend that morning, anyway. Queening as Philip called it.

  
By the time I actually got the chance to talk to him, it was late afternoon. He was in his bedroom, and he looked like he was getting ready to leave again.

  
“Where are you going?” I asked.

  
“Out.”

  
“Out where?”

  
“To a party. At Baron’s house.”

  
“I see. And you’re going with Mike, I presume.”

  
“Yes.” I frowned. An idea had come into my head. I knew what I could do to get him to confess.

  
“Oh. That’s disappointing.” I remarked, walking towards him. I grabbed his tie and kissed him. “Because I was hoping to spend some time with you tonight.” I took off his tie and unbuttoned his shirt. I knew this would work. I had some kind of enchanting quality that Philip was unable to resist. I ran my hand down his bare chest and stopped at the bulge that had formed in his pants. I massaged his crotch. I smiled as he moaned. “What would you have done tonight anyway?”

  
“Nothing like this.” He moaned.

  
“Really?” I asked. I took off his belt and unbuttoned his trousers. I slid his pants and his boxers to the floor and pushed him on the bed. “This wouldn’t be happening with some other woman?”

  
“No.” He answered as he unbuttoned my dress. He undressed me and I climbed on top of him. I leaned down and nibbled his ear as I rode him.

  
“Some other woman wouldn’t be riding you like this?” I whispered, trying to control my voice. I wanted to moan in pleasure, but I had to stay calm and focused. “She wouldn’t be kissing you or touching you like this? Of course, she could never do it quite like this.”

  
“No, she could never compare to you.” I froze in shock. What had he just said to me?

  
“Excuse me?”

  
“What?”

  
“Who is ‘she’?”

  
“No one. I was just agreeing with you. No one could ever love me like you do.” He denied. But I saw the guilt flash in his eyes.

  
“Bullshit.” I climbed off him.

  
“Elizabeth, I didn’t mean anything by it.” I crawled out of bed and walked picked up my clothes.

“Come on, I’m not cheating on you. I would never do that.

  
“Go enjoy your party.” I told him. “I’m sure there will be plenty more whores there for you to fuck.”  
  
I left and went to my room. I put my clothes back on and sat on my bed. Philip really was cheating on me, wasn’t he? Hadn’t he just admitted it? I had to find out the truth about what really went on at the Thursday Club. And I figured out how I’d do it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was short, but the drama is just getting started. Chapter 2 will be out soon! :)


	2. The Cheater

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the beginning of Elizabeth sleeping with men that aren’t Philip. So if you’re vehemently opposed to that, this is your last chance to leave. Otherwise, enjoy! :)

After Philip left, I put my clothes back on and went back to my room. I had a plan. I picked up the phone and called Patrick Plunkett. He was an old friend of mine. He would help me, right?

“Hello?” He picked up.

“Patrick.”

“Elizabeth? You haven’t called me in a long time. Is something wrong?”

“I need your help.” I told him.

“With what?”

“I know that Philip is cheating on me.” I explained. “He basically just admitted it to me on accident. Not that he’ll ever truly own up to it. Which is why I need proof. I need to know exactly what he does with the Thursday Club.”

“And what exactly do you want me to do?”

“I want you to spy on him. Go to their lunch club, then follow him to any parties they might be having afterwards. If they invite you to any parties over the weekend, go. On Monday, tell me everything you saw.”

“Why me?”

“Philip doesn’t know you.” I replied. “I’d send Porchey, but Philip would recognize him and get suspicious. He’d know what I was up to. But Philip would never suspect a thing with you. As long as you act natural. Act like you really want to be there.”

“Alright. I’ll do it.” He agreed after a minute.

“One more thing.” I added.

“What?”

“Never mention my name. If Philip asks you about me, say you don’t know me. He would be absolutely furious if he found out I sent you.”

I waited impatiently all weekend. Monday couldn’t come fast enough. I didn’t think I could spend another moment not knowing.

Eventually, of course, Monday came. I called Patrick and asked him to come see me at noon. He agreed.

He walked in the audience room looking nervous. I could tell just by looking at his face that I wasn’t going to like what he had to say. But I didn’t care. I had to know what Philip was really doing with the Thursday Club.

“Hello, Elizabeth.” Patrick said as he sat down across from me.

“Hello, Patrick.” I got straight to the point. “So, what happened over the weekend?”

“Um, I mean, not that much.” I could tell he didn’t want to tell me. “There were a few parties over the weekend. That’s about it.”

“And what exactly happened at those parties? What happened at the luncheon?”

“Like I said, nothing too interesting. Mostly just a bunch of men getting together and having some drinks. Talking.”

“And of course there were women there too, I presume.”

“A few.”

“And what did they do with the women?” I asked, getting frustrated. He sighed.

“Elizabeth, it’s not,” he stopped himself. “They just,” he stopped again, seemingly unable to figure out what he wanted him to say.

“Patrick, what happened? I didn’t send you there just to have a good time.” He shook his head. I could read the look in his eyes. He didn’t want to hurt me. But I had to know. He had to tell me. Suddenly, an idea flashed into my mind. Maybe I could get him to confess the same way I’d gotten Philip to. A new look came across my face, and I let myself become a less innocent version of me. I didn’t want to do this, but I’d do what I had to. I walked toward him seductively and climbed into his lap. “Patrick,” I said, biting his earlobe softly. I put one hand on his crotch and massaged it. “What happened?”

“Elizabeth,” he moaned. But he didn’t say anything else. I kissed him and he latched on desperately. I carried on teasing him until he started trying to undress me. I pulled away. “Elizabeth, I never realized it until now, but I want you so bad.”

“And you can have me. But only if you tell me what happened.”

“There were women at the luncheon, but they were just waitresses.” He blurted out. “Nothing beyond flirting really went on there. Not until the parties. There was one every night. They were full of alcohol and beautiful women. They all got drunk and played sex games. They all slept with a lot of different women. Including Philip. I recall seeing him sneak off with at least four women.” I was stunned. This was the answer I had expected, but I still wasn’t prepared for it. But I didn’t let myself slip out of my seductive demeanor. I took a deep breath and kissed him again. He had kept his end of the deal, now it was time to keep mine.

“Well, let’s get on with it then.” I said.

We had sex. I didn’t really enjoy it, but he didn’t seem to notice. When we finished, we put our clothes back on and sat in silence. Neither of us knew what to do. Guilt was already washing over me. After a moment, Patrick got up.

“I really should be going.” He said.

“Right. Goodbye.”

He left, but I stayed where I was. I was frozen to the spot. What did I do now? It wasn’t like I was going to confront Philip with this new information. So what was I going to do with it? Stew in it? Besides, I had left myself with no leg to stand on anymore. In order to get the information that Philip was cheating on me, I had to cheat on him. I felt guilty and slightly sick. What if Philip found out? What would I do then? Confront him? Just admit my guilt and beg for forgiveness? I had taken our already rocky marriage and risked making it worse. To get information I wasn’t going to do anything with. Not to mention I had ruined a friendship in the process. Patrick had been a good friend my whole life, but things would never be the same between us again. I sighed. I knew I had just begun walking down a dangerous path. And I knew that I could never turn back.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you’re enjoying it so far! I’ll have more out soon. Thanks for reading! :)


	3. Private Secretary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is quite a bit longer than the others. But I hope you enjoy it! :)

I never mentioned a thing about what I found out to Philip. He never knew why Patrick was there. Thankfully, he also never knew that I had slept with him. I tried to pretend that my meeting with Patrick never happened. I tried to ignore the guilt and fear creeping up inside me. But I couldn’t.

The past several weeks had been rough. I was colder and more distant with Philip, which certainly wasn’t helping us. And Patrick and I had all but stopped talking. I took it too far, and it had basically ruined our friendship. Not to mention drama with Margaret. I’d had to send Peter away when their relationship had been leaked to the press. She wanted to marry him. And she could. But in two years. When he returned, she would be 25 and no longer need my permission to marry. Then they could get married and live happily ever after. If only she saw it that way. She thought I was trying to tear them apart. She’s hardly spoken to me since he left, and when she has it’s been with anger and bitterness.

Finally, though, I was having a good day. Tommy was retiring. I know he had done a lot in service of the crown, but I couldn’t help but be happy about the news. After all, he was a big part of the reason Margaret was mad at me. Things weren’t all great though. According to Tommy, Michael Adeane had to be my new private secretary. But I wanted Martin Charteris and I was determined to get my way. After all, he was my private secretary before I became queen, and we had grown quite close during that time. I called Martin into my office to talk to me about it.

“Ma’am? You wanted to see me?”

“Yes, Martin. Please sit down.” I told him. “As you are aware, Tommy Lascelles is retiring this year. And I was hoping that you could fill his shoes.”

“What do you mean?”

“I want you to be my private secretary.”

“But, ma’am, Michael is the natural replacement.”

“I’m aware.” I stated. “But I don’t care. I want you, and as the queen, I feel I should be entitled to get what I want just this once.”

“I certainly know what Tommy would have to say about that.” Martin remarked.

“Yes.” I smiled. “He’d tell me I sounded like my uncle and was well on my way to destroying the monarchy.” Martin laughed, but his face quickly grew more serious again.

“I’m flattered by your offer, but I’m afraid I cannot accept.”

“You can. And will.”

“Ma’am,”

“Call me Elizabeth.” I interrupted. My demeanor suddenly changed. As horrible as it was, I knew this was a sure way to get what I wanted. I gave him a look and instantly, his demeanor changed too.

“Well, it seems that you’re up to something, Elizabeth.” This was certainly a side of Martin I had never seen before. Patrick had been desperate, but I could tell Martin would be different. Good. Maybe I wouldn’t feel as guilty afterwards.

“Perhaps I am.” I stood up. “Shut the door.”

“Of course.” He backed toward the door and shut it, never once taking his eyes off me. I smirked. I walked toward him as he walked back to me, and I met him in the middle of the room. I ran my hands up his chest, then grabbed his tie.

“Martin, have I ever told you how gorgeous you are before?”

“No.” He took my hand off his tie and cupped my face in his hands. “Elizabeth, have I ever told you how beautiful you are before?” I blushed. I didn’t want to, but I couldn’t help it.

“No.” I smiled.

He kissed me on the cheek. I grabbed him and kissed him on the lips. He latched on, but he wasn’t desperate like Patrick. This was pure passion. From my end as well. Was it possible we had both carried an unrealized desire for each other all these years? Is that why I was so quick to jump to this? I didn’t care. I just suddenly wanted him, and I could tell he wanted me too. We teased each other as we made out, the sexual tension slowly growing. Eventually, he pushed me on the couch. We continued to tease each other as we undressed. When we were naked, he pulled my hands away from him. He fingered me as he kissed my neck. I was desperate at this point.

“Martin,” I moaned. “Just fuck me already.” He pulled away from me completely. “Please.” I whined.

“You know, I quite like having the most powerful woman in the world at my mercy.” He smirked, rubbing me again with one finger.

“Just do it.” I begged.

“Are you sure you want it?”

“I’m sure if you are.”

Having sex with Martin was a completely different experience than Patrick. I had Patrick under my thumb, but not so much with Martin. He wanted to take control, and I let him. There was an odd dynamic between us. I had been his boss for so long, and I guessed that he wanted the feeling of having control over me for once. And perhaps I liked the feeling of not having to be in charge for once. But I knew that it couldn’t last. The moment we finished, I would be his boss again.

Afterwards, we half sat-half laid on the couch, still tangled up.

“I must say, when I woke up this morning, I certainly didn’t envision this happening.” Martin remarked.

“Neither did I.” I laughed. “But I enjoyed it. A lot.”

“So did I. Maybe we could do it again sometime.”

“Maybe.” I replied. “I think you better get back to work.”

“Yeah.” Martin got up and put his clothes back on. I stopped him as he started to leave.

“Martin, you can’t tell anyone what happened today.”

“Of course not.” He nodded, and I knew our secret was safe.

The next day, I got some interesting news. Winston Churchill was sick, which meant he couldn’t go to America to visit President Eisenhower. Instead, Eisenhower would be coming here. I would have to learn about him and his interests in order to not look like a fool. Needless to say, I wasn’t thrilled about it.

Not to mention Tommy still expected me to pick Michael Adeane as my next private secretary. I was quite beyond caring though. I had made a pact with Martin. A secret pact no one could ever no about. But I was determined to make him my private secretary. And I already knew I would go to interesting, and probably immoral, lengths to do it.

I didn’t like this new side of me when I first discovered it. But suddenly I loved it. I could get what I wanted just by sleeping with someone. And a very attractive someone at that. I had expected to feel guilty for sleeping with Martin. And I did, a little. But I still wanted to do it again. And I wanted to be in control this time.

A few days later, Martin came to see me again. He told me, much to my relief, that President Eisenhower was no longer coming due to a political crisis at home. I’ll admit I was a little skeptical, mainly because I had never heard anything about a sudden political crisis in America. I had my suspicions that there was something being kept from me here. But I was relieved nonetheless that I wouldn’t have to worry about talking to Eisenhower. Martin’s news wasn’t all good, though. 

“Ma’am,” he added hesitantly. “I’ve done some thinking about your offer to be your private secretary. And I’m afraid I cannot accept.”

“Why not?”

“Because I firmly believe that Michael Adeane would serve you better.”

“No you don’t.” I stood up. “Nor could you ever believe that. For the very good reason that it’s not true. Tommy put you up to this, didn’t he?”

“Yes.” He admitted awkwardly. I smiled and let my demeanor change again.

“Well, I’ll take care of him.” I walked towards Martin and shut the door behind him. “Don’t you worry. You will be my private secretary. That is what you want isn’t it?”

“Of course. Elizabeth.” He added my name with a smile.

I kissed him hard. I massaged his crotch with one hand as I pushed him away from the door. He moaned as I pushed him on the couch. I saw the look of desperation in his eyes when I stopped to undress him. I giggled. Last time, I was at his mercy. But this time, he would be at mine. When he was naked, I pulled him to his feet. I nibbled at his ear while I stroked him. I kneeled down slowly, running my lips down his body as I went. When I was on my knees, I stopped and looked up at him. He wanted this so bad. I smiled, then took him in my mouth.

“Elizabeth, that was amazing.” He said when he finished. I smirked.

“Well, then perhaps I deserve some sort of repayment.” I got up and sat on the couch. I opened my legs to him. He raised an eyebrow. “I got on my knees. Now you get on yours.” I was determined to stay in control.

Martin obeyed. He knelt down in front of me and slid off my shoes, as well as my pantyhose and underwear. As he put his lips on me, I grabbed his head so I could guide him exactly where I wanted him. When I finished, I laid back on the couch, breathless.

“That was incredible.” I told him. “But you better get back to work now.”

“Right.”

Later that day, I went to see Tommy. We got in a small argument, but I held my ground. I left still determined to make Martin my private secretary.

Over the next few days, Martin dropped in a couple times and we had sex. I had stopped feeling guilty about it. If Philip could have his fun, why couldn’t I?

I was growing more concerned about Winston’s health. He had missed our last audience. In fact, that was the second consecutive audience he had missed. I had been told he had a cold, but I suspected it was more serious than that. Still, that wasn’t my biggest concern. I was still fighting Tommy about making Martin my private secretary, and I was pretty sure I would win.

One day, Tommy came to see me in my office. I hadn’t been expecting him.

“Tommy,” I greeted him. “What brings you here?”

“It has come to my attention that in your determination to make Colonel Charteris your private secretary, you have taken unprecedented measures to convince him that he should accept your offer come what may.”

“What are you talking about?” Panic washed over me. How had he found out? I tried to pretend I had no idea what he was referring to, but deep down I knew it wouldn’t work.

“Don’t play innocent. I know that you have had,” he paused, searching for the right words. “Inappropriate relations with Colonel Charteris.” I knew it was pointless to deny it.

“How did you find out?”

“Don’t worry. Your little paramour didn’t tell me, if that’s what you think.”

“Then who did?” I had no idea who could have told him. And how did they find out?

“That shall remain a secret. It’s not the point.” He replied. “This behavior is completely unacceptable and unlike anything I’ve ever seen a monarch try to get away with before. And believe me when I say I saw your uncle try to get away with a lot. If the public found out about this, it could destroy the monarchy.”

“You wouldn’t dare tell.” Was he threatening me? 

“I won’t. On one condition.” Shit. I knew what was coming. “You take Michael Adeane as your new private secretary.”

I couldn’t believe it. He was blackmailing me. He had left me with no choice but to give up. To let Michael Adeane be my private secretary. I sighed.

“Fine.” I agreed.

“Good.” He smirked. “And your indiscretion remain a secret.”

Tommy left. I sat stunned. I believed Tommy when he said Martin hadn’t told. But I just couldn’t figure out who had. I sighed. I knew what I had to do now. I called Martin and told him I needed to see him in my office.

“Ma’am.” Martin greeted me as he entered my office. He took one look at me and knew something was wrong. “What’s going on?”

“I’m afraid, you cannot be my private secretary.” I told him. “I have no choice anymore. Tommy knows. He knows that I slept with you. And he threatened to release the information to the public unless I make Michael Adeane my private secretary.”

“Oh god. I swear I didn’t tell.” I walked over to him and led him to the couch .

“I know you didn’t.” I sat down next to him.  
  
“Who did?” He asked.

“I have no idea.” We sat in silence for a moment, before I remembered my other problem. “You wouldn’t happen to have any idea what’s going on with the prime minister would you?”

“No. Why?”

“I think something’s wrong with him.” I explained. “Do you know of anyone who would? Preferably someone my own age.” I smirked.

“Maybe. But I’m not giving out that kind of information for free.” Martin smiled and ran a hand up my skirt. I giggled and took off my shoes. He kissed me and rubbed me over my panties, while I massaged his crotch. After a few minutes, I took off my panties, suddenly desperate for him. He slid two fingers inside me while rubbing me with his thumb. I moaned as I undressed him, whimpering when he had to stop to take off his shirt.

“Martin,” I moaned when he started again. When he was naked, I climbed on top of him desperately. It was probably our best sexual experience yet. For a minute after we finished, all I could do was lay on his chest breathless.

“So, would you like to know who could help you?” Martin asked.

“Who?” I had almost forgotten, but I was eager to know.

“Perhaps David Harrison. He’s Jock Colville’s assistant. A year younger than you. If anyone will, um, confess, what’s going on at Downing Street, it’s him.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course.” He paused, as though he had a question he was unsure about asking. “Elizabeth, our little visits don’t have to end now just because I can’t be your private secretary, do they?”

“Of course not.” I told him. “Having sex with you gives me satisfaction, and not just because you’re so good at it. It also makes me feel as though I’m getting even with Philip.”

“Is he cheating on you?”

“Yes.”

“And yet, in taking revenge, you’re making me cheat on my own wife.”

“But you enjoy it.” I pointed out. “Perhaps, here, we’re all forced to be so perfect constantly, that we all take satisfaction from doing the wrong thing. Sometimes, it feels good to be bad.”

“I think you’re exactly right.” He replied. “You know, you’re an incredibly smart woman.”

“I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The scandal is just getting started! Stay tuned, my lovely readers! :)


	4. A Night with David Harrison

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it’s been like four months since I’ve updated this. I had decided to stop writing it but a few weeks ago I decided to start it again. Sorry for the wait. Enjoy! :)

I waited nervously in my office. I had scheduled an appointment with David Harrison to find out what was going on at Downing Street. Hopefully I wouldn’t have to sleep with him to get him to find out. And if I did, hopefully, he was attractive.

I heard a knock at the door.

“Come in.” I called.

“Your Majesty.” The man greeted as he opened the door.

“You must be David Harrison.”

“I am.” He nodded.

Oh god, was he ever attractive. He was tall, with black hair and stunning green eyes. He was a beautiful man, with an air of mystery around him.

He reached out and kissed my hand, and I tried not to visibly swoon.

“Sit down.” I motioned to the chair on the other side of my desk. He sat down. “I’ve asked you here today because I want to know what’s going on at Downing Street. And I’ve been told that if anyone will tell me what’s really happening over there, you will.”

“What do you want to know?”

“What’s going on with the Prime Minister?” I asked. “What’s wrong with him. Because I know that it has to be more than a cold. I’m not stupid.”

“Ma’am, I do know what’s wrong with the P.M..” He confessed with a sly smile. “However, if you wish for me to tell you, you’ll have to meet me at my place tonight at 10.”

I gave an innocent smile, pretending not to catch on to what he wanted.

“Very well.” I agreed. “What’s your address?”

“Do you have a piece of paper?” I nodded and passed him a notepad and a pen. He wrote something down and passed it back. “Here you go.”

“Thank you.” I nodded. “I guess you may go then.”

He nodded and got up to leave. At the door, he turned back to me.

“You know, you’re even more beautiful in person.” He flirted.

“You don’t look half bad yourself.”

That night, I knocked on the door of the address David gave me. I was a few minutes early, but he answered right away.

“Good evening, Your Majesty.” He greeted.

“Good evening, David.” 

“Come in.” He guided me to his sitting room.

I sat down on the couch and he sat down next to me.

“So, what’s going on at Downing Street? What is Winston really up to?” I asked getting straight to the point.

“Oh, you’re not getting an answer that easily.” He teased, his mood shifting. I raised an eyebrow, changing my demeanor as well.

“I’m not?”

“No.” He smirked. ”I’m going to have to get to know you first.”

“Oh?”

“Can I call you Elizabeth?” He asked me. I raised an eyebrow. That was kind of a forward question for having just met me this morning. Still, I felt I had to agree.

“Yes.” I replied after a moment.

“Good.” He smiled. “I just feel we’ll be able to get to know each other better if we’re on equal terms.” I nodded. “Now, you just stay here a second. I’ll be right back. I have to grab something.”

“Alright.” He left the room and came back a few minutes later with some pills and a glass of water. “What are those?” I asked.

“Ecstasy.” He answered. I raised an eyebrow. Did he want me to do drugs? “Don’t worry. Nothing bad is going to happen. You’ll just be really…happy.”

David took out a pill and cut it in half. He handed one half to me.

“Are you sure this won’t hurt me?” I asked, nervous.

“I’m sure. You may feel a little anxious at first, but once it kicks in, you’ll feel wonderful.”

“When will it kick in?”

“In about an hour probably.” He answered. I took a deep breath and swallowed the pill, then he took his half. “Fair warning, in about twenty minutes, you might start to feel a little shaky and nervous, but that will go away when the pill really kicks in.”

His warning scared me a little but I pushed it aside.

“So, what do you want to talk about?” I asked.

“Well, let’s start with you.”

  
“What do you want to know?”

“Is being the monarch as stressful as it sounds?” He asked. “To most people, it probably sounds like a dream, but working for the Prime Minister, I have some awareness of how much responsibility comes with being the monarch. It sounds like a nightmare to me”

“It is stressful, and it can be a nightmare sometimes.” I explained. “But having a good support system helps. Or it would if I had one.”

“Your family isn’t supportive?”

“No. My mother and sister resent me. So does my husband.” I told him. “Not having Philip there is what hurts me the most. He took an oath at my coronation to be my liegeman of life and limb, but he refuses to keep it. He’s never there for me. He spends most of his time out partying and cheating on me. And when he’s home, he either ignores me or picks fights.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“So, what’s your life like?” I asked him. “Are you in a relationship?”

“No. I’ve dated a couple of women recently but, nothing’s stuck.” He told me. “I’ve never had a serious relationship. A few years ago, I had a huge crush on a girl I worked with. Her name was Venetia Scott. She was Winston’s personal secretary. She started working at Downing Street the same year I did. We were the same age.”

“Did you date her? What happened to her?”

“She died.” He explained. “Got hit by a bus during the great smog. I had just gotten up the courage to ask her out. I went to work one day, intending to ask her on a date, only to find out she was dead. I will always regret not having asked her sooner. She was beautiful, smart, energetic, passionate. She was perfect. And then she was gone. I don’t think I’ll ever stop mourning her. And someday, when I do marry and have children, I fully intend to name my first daughter after her.”

“I’m sure she’ll love that.” I told him. “She sounds like a woman I would’ve loved to meet.”

“You would’ve liked her. Everyone did.” I could tell he still loved her just from his face when he talked about her. There was a sad smile in his eyes. “I think Winston saw her as another daughter.”

“Speaking of Winston, what’s he up to?”

“I’ll tell you later.” He teased.

David and I talked for an hour, about life, love, family. Everything.

“I have to pee.” I said suddenly. I felt the pill finally starting to kick in.

“Alright. Meet me back in here when you’re done.”

I nodded. I sat down on the toilet. It took a minute for me to be able to pee, but eventually I did. I stood up to wash my hands and looked at myself in the mirror. My pupils were incredibly dilated and my skin was ghastly, but I smiled anyway. I looked like a corpse, but in that moment, I was still the sexiest thing I’d ever seen. Until I walked into the living room and saw David sitting on the couch. I grinned.

I sat back down next to him. We talked for a few more minutes. Suddenly, he leaned over and kissed me. I latched on and we made out. It was magical and passionate. Before we knew it, we were undressing each other.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” He asked me, when we were naked.

“Of course.” I replied confidently. It had become so easy to slip into my new personality that I hardly noticed I was doing it anymore.

“What about Philip?”

“Fuck Philip. I know for a fact he’s cheated on me with a number of women. If he can have his fun, why can’t I have mine?”

I rubbed myself against his leg as we made out some more. His lips suddenly moved to my neck and I moaned. My hands moved down his body and I teased him. We carried on like this until neither of us could take it anymore.

He pushed me down on the couch and we made love. It was quite possibly the best thing I’d ever experienced. Every touch, every kiss felt amazing.

When we finished, we got dressed and went to his bedroom. We talked for hours. I was happier than I had been in years. Maybe ever.

After six hours or so, the effects of the pill started to wear off. I could feel myself coming back down.

“Stay here.” David said, getting up. “I’ll be right back.” He left the room and came back a few minutes later with a bag of marijuana, some paper, and a lighter. “This will help with the come down.” He told me.

“Oh?” I wasn’t too thrilled at the prospect of doing more drugs, but I figured he knew what he was talking about. He didn’t seem to want to hurt me.

He sat down on the bed and rolled a joint on the nightstand. He lit it up and handed it to me.

It made me feel strange to say the least, but it did make me more relaxed. David turned to me.

“How do you feel?” He asked me. All I could do was smile.

He leaned over and kissed me. I kissed back and we made out. Eventually, we made love again. It was amazing. I felt so connected to him. It was strange but wonderful.

After we finished, he rolled off me and held me in his arms.

“You need to get some sleep.” He told me. I nodded.

It was almost one in the afternoon when I woke up. I felt sort of like I had a hangover, but not as bad. I did feel mostly normal again, I was just really tired. David was already awake.

“Good morning.” He said.

“It’s afternoon.” I corrected with a smile.

“Good afternoon then.” He replied.

“Not to be rude, but will you tell me what the hell is going on at Downing Street now?” I asked. He sighed, and was silent for a few moments, clearly trying to work out what to say. Finally, he spoke.

“Winston had a stroke.” He began. “He insisted on keeping it from you. So did Lord Salisbury. And since he could no longer fly to America for a meeting with Eisenhower, he decided to invite the president here. But then, he had another stroke. And he couldn’t see Eisenhower anyway. But they insisted on keeping it from you again, and instead tell you the meeting had been cancelled because of a political crisis in America.”

I was furious. How dare they? I didn’t know what I should do, or even what I could do in this situation, but I knew I had to do something. 

“Would you like something to eat?” He asked me after a few minutes of silence.

“Sure.” I replied. 

We got dressed and he led me to his kitchen. I sat down at the dining room table while he made lunch. 

After we ate, I decided it was time to go. I obviously had some work to do.

“I better get going.” I told him.

“Alright.” He agreed. He led me to the door. “I hope I get to see you again someday.”

“Perhaps you will.”

“Oh, and by the way, don’t let them get away with it.”

“Oh, trust me, I won’t.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed that. I’ll be writing more soon! :)


	5. Dressing Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one’s a little short, but I’m wrapping up a plot line. I hope you enjoy it! :)

I went back to the Palace with a mix of emotions. I was confused, angry, upset. I had no idea what to do, but I knew I had to do something. I went up to my room and changed clothes before going to my office. I had a lot to catch up on since I hadn’t gotten time to go through my red box yet.

I read through the papers, but I couldn’t focus on them. All my energy was focused on what I should do about Winston and Lord Salisbury. I couldn’t let them get away with lying to me like that, but how could I punish them? I felt like I should ask for advice.

I called the only person who knew about the situation.

“Ma’am.” Martin said, as he entered the room. I rolled my eyes at his formality, knowing this meeting would likely end in a most informal way. He seemed to know it to, because he shut the door behind him.

“Martin, you know you can call me Elizabeth.” I smiled, walking to the couch. He sat down next to me. “So, I met with David Harrison yesterday.”

“Here?”

“Initially yes. But he said that if I wanted to know what was going on at Downing Street, I had to meet him at his flat at 10.”

“So I assume you went.”

“Yes.”

“Well, what happened?” He asked.

“He said he had to get to know me better before he told me.” I explained. “And then he gave me ecstasy. If you’re wondering what it’s like to be on ecstasy, it mostly just make you really happy. Anyway, we talked and eventually, we had sex. Then we talked some more. When the ecstasy started to wear off, David and I smoked marijuana. Apparently, it helps with the comedown. I felt awfully silly, but we had sex again and then we went to sleep. When I woke up, he finally told me what’s going on.”

“Well?”

“Winston had a stroke. Two actually. And he and Lord Salisbury conspired to hide it from me.”

“What are you going to do about it?”

“I don’t know.” I replied. “That’s why I asked you here.”

“Oh, you’re asking my advice.” He said, a sly smile crossing his face. “Well I think we both know what’s going to have to happen first.”

“Martin, I-,” I laughed. He cut me off with a kiss.

“You what?”

“I forgot.”

He kissed me again and wrapped his arms around me. I melted into his touch. We undressed each other as we made out, our kiss growing deeper and more passionate as we went. When we were naked, he pushed me back on the couch and climbed on top of me.

As we made love, he stroked and kissed me all over my body.

“Fuck.” I moaned in pleasure. “Martin.” He smiled and kissed my neck while he caressed my body. I moaned again. “How are you so fucking good at this?”

“It’s a secret.”

His lips landed back on mine and we made out as his hands continued to explore my body. I bit his lip in pleasure as his hands found a particularly sensitive spot. I was completely lost in his love.

When we finished, we got dressed and sat back on the couch.

“You know, that’s a price I will always be happy to pay for your help.” I remarked. “And speaking of your help, what should I do about Winston?”

“Summon him and Lord Salisbury and give them a good dressing down. Put them back in their place.”

“I can’t just summon the most powerful men in the country and give them a dressing down like children.”

“You can. And should. God knows they deserve it.”

“Perhaps. But why on earth would they stand for that?”

“Because they’re English, male, and upper class. A good dressing down from nanny is what they most want in life.” He smiled. “Besides, who bloody cares if they’ll stand for it or not. They’re the ones in the wrong here.”

“Fine.” I agreed. “I’ll summon them tomorrow.”

“Good.” He stood up to leave and I walked with him to the door.

“Thank you.”

“Anytime.” He winked and walked out.

The next day, I did exactly what Martin told me to do. I summoned them and gave them a good dressing down. I let Lord Salisbury have it with both barrels, but I went a bit easier on Winston. I had more respect for him. And more sympathy. He had been a great deal of help to me while I was transitioning into my new role as queen. But still, I made my point with him. The government cannot function properly if the Prime Minister is lying to the sovereign. 

I left the meetings feeling quite satisfied with myself. I had a feeling neither of them would try to pull a stunt like that again.

Surprisingly, Philip was home when I returned. He was in his room, getting dressed into formal wear.

“What are you all dressed up for?” I asked him.

“Haven’t you heard? We have a state dinner tonight.”

“Haven’t you heard? It’s been cancelled.”

“Christ. Why am I always the last to know about these things?”

“Maybe if you were here more often.” I jabbed. He didn’t respond to that. Instead, he changed the subject, leaning back against his bed frame, looking at me with a sly smile.

“You look different.” He remarked.

“How so?”

“You just seem,”

“I advise you to choose your next words very carefully.”

“Taller. Or perhaps I’ve just shrunk.” He must’ve sensed my more confident mood.

“There’s nothing shrunken about you, dearest.”

“Well, since I’ve found myself unexpectedly free tonight, I thought maybe you and I could spend some time together.” He smiled again.

“And do what?”

“Two options. Either I get some stilts to reach the heights of my new, tall woman,”

“Or?”

“Or she could get on her knees.”

I smirked and gave in to his request. Philip could never know that he hadn’t been the only man in my bed lately. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed that. Stay tuned. I’ll have more for you soon. :)


	6. The Goddess and the Devil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one’s pretty short but enjoy!

__I sat anxiously on the plane. Philip and I had been gone for the last five months on the Commonwealth Tour. We had both been miserable. Sure there had been some fun moments, but usually, you could cut the tension between us with a knife. Dealing with tight schedules and constant events was wearing us both down. We were ready to be home. We were ready for some of the pressures to ease.

Besides, in the weeks leading up to the tour, both of us had become accustomed to living a certain lifestyle that just could not be maintained while on a tour like that. Not least because the people we lived those lifestyles with were thousands of miles away. We just didn’t spend that much time with each other at home, and spending this much time together got on our nerves.

When we landed, I eagerly stepped off the plane. While part of me was aware that I would still face the pressures of being the queen while I was home, another part of me was excited for a bit of freedom. A part of me that I had been suppressing for months. A part that was chomping at the bit to be released.

Philip and I went our separate ways as soon as we got back to the palace. He went to a party with Mike, while I walked up to Martin’s office. I went in the door without even knocking. Thankfully, he was alone.

“Your Majesty,” He stood up to greet me. I ignored his formality.

“You already know what to call me.” I shut the door behind me and kissed him. Hard.

”Elizabeth,” he gasped when we pulled apart. “It’s good to see you again.” 

I replied with another kiss. We undressed each other frantically as we made out. We ended up having sex on his desk. After not seeing each other for five months, it was pure passion and desperation. And it was somehow even better than I remembered.

After we finished, we talked for a few minutes to catch up with each other. But I couldn’t stay long. I had a meeting with Margaret. She was supposed to deputize for me while I was on the tour, but she had brought too much attention to herself and caused too much drama.

I sat down in the audience room, waiting for her.

“What’s all this?” Margaret asked, entering the room.

“You’re job was simple.” I explained, as she sat down across from me. “Perform your duties with the minimum of fuss. Not end up all over the headlines.”

“I can’t help it if the newspapers want to write about me.”

“It would help if you didn’t give them anything to write about.”

“I gave the people what they wanted. Character. Life.”

“You gave them drama and instability.”

“Well I’m sorry I’m not perfect like you.” She spat.

“Margaret, I’m not perfect.”

“You are. It’s inevitable really.” She remarked. “Two sisters so close in age, one becomes one thing, while the other, necessarily, becomes the opposite. If one is the queen, she must be the source of all that is good, while the other becomes the source of the most creative malice. Evil.”

“No one thinks you’re evil.”

“Next to you, I’ll always be evil. You’re the goddess, so I must be the devil.”

“Margaret, you have no idea what you’re talking about.” I rolled my eyes, almost smiling. If only she knew. “You have no idea who I am, or what I’ve done.”

“And just what have you done?” She questioned, raising an eyebrow. “Cheated on Philip? Committed a crime? Please, I would love to know.”

“It’s none of your business.” I replied defensively. I had said too much.

“You’re right. Perhaps I’m not the devil. Perhaps you’re both. The goddess and the devil.”

“Perhaps I am.”

After Margaret left, I stayed in my chair, thinking. About who I was. There had been two Elizabeths ever since I became queen. But over the past few months, a third Elizabeth had developed. There was the human, Elizabeth Windsor and the goddess, Elizabeth Regina. Now, there was the devil. What would I call her? I smirked. Elizabeth Leviathan. Sounded about right. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, S/O to G-Eazy, since I got the name Leviathan from one of his songs. 
> 
> Second, stay tuned for more of the saga of the three Elizabeths! :)


	7. No Control

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty short and also pretty violent. Enjoy! :)

A few days had passed since my conversation with Margaret. I was laying in bed, trying to sleep. It was well past midnight, but I just couldn’t shut my brain off. A voice in my head kept telling me to get up.

Finally, I did. I decided to take a walk around the palace. But as I was leaving, I heard noises coming from Philip’s room.

The door was open a crack, so I peeked in. Philip was in there, sleeping with another woman. I gasped.

I didn’t know what to do. I knew he was cheating, but I never thought he would be so brazen as to bring another woman here.

I wanted to walk in there and kill them both, I was so angry. But did I even have the right to be that upset? After all, hadn’t I spent the past several months cheating on Philip?

But I pushed the thought aside. I told myself that was different. After all, the only reason I had cheated was because I knew he had.

I had to do something. This whore needed to know she couldn’t fuck around with my husband. But I couldn’t barge in there. Philip could never know what I saw.

Suddenly, I got an idea. Well, actually the devil got an idea. I smiled.

I went back to my room to watch his door. I hid where she wouldn’t see me when she walked out. And I laid in wait for her.

I waited for almost an hour. But she finally came out. As soon as I heard her shut the door behind her, I ran up to her. I grabbed her arm and dragged her out of our apartment and into a small room across the hall. I shut and locked the door behind us. I turned on the light, but it was still pretty dark.

“Who the hell are you and what were you doing with my husband?” I demanded. I stared her down. She was blonde and gorgeous. Just the type I imagined Philip cheating with.

“My name is Abigail.” She said, looking terrified. “And I met your husband at a party. He bought me a few drinks and convinced me to come home with him. And I think you already know what happened next. I’m sorry.”

“Sorry doesn’t bloody cut it.” I was losing control of myself. I could feel Elizabeth Windsor inside of me, telling me to calm down. But Elizabeth Leviathan ignored her.

I lunged for her and pinned her against the wall, slamming her head against it. She screamed, but I covered her mouth with my hand. I threw her on the floor and sat on top of her. I punched her in the face as hard as I could. She reached up and started scratching and biting me. I kept hitting her, but she managed to roll us over. We became a tangled ball on the floor, hitting, scratching and biting each other. Eventually, I bit down on her arm hard enough to draw blood and got back on top of her. I scratched down her face and neck as hard as I could before choking her.

“I’m sorry.” She let out a strangled cry. I squeezed harder.

I kept choking her until I suddenly realized I was about to kill her. I let go and she gasped for air.

“I’ll let you go, on two conditions.” I told her.

“Anything.” Abigail replied desperately.

“First, never so much as speak to my husband again.” I spat. “Second, never tell anyone this little confrontation happened.”

“Of course.” She agreed. I let her leave.

She ran out and shut the door behind her. I stayed in the room, exhausted. The more I thought about what had just happened, the more terrified I became. I had no control over the devil. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> S/O to a friend of mine for coming up with the name Abigail.  
> Stay tuned for more drama! :)


	8. Porchey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was inevitable, but I hope you like it. ;)

The next day, I went out to the stables. I was officially there on business matters, but I mostly went to see Porchey. 

 

I could feel myself slowly descending into insanity as Elizabeth Leviathan took over. But Porchey has always been able to bring out the best in me, and I was hoping he would be able to bring Elizabeth Windsor back to the surface. 

 

I waited for him in my office. When I saw his car pull up, I checked my hair in the mirror to make sure I still looked fine. I decided I did.

 

I walked outside to meet him. 

 

“Porchey,” I greeted him with a hug. “How have you been?”

 

“I’ve been just fine.” He replied. “How have you been, Lilibet? I haven’t gotten to see you since you got back from the tour.”

 

“Things have been interesting.” I didn’t want to lie to him, but I didn’t want to tell him the truth either. 

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

 

“Don’t worry about it. I’m fine.” 

 

“If you insist.” He didn’t look convinced, but he went on. “So, what did you call me here today for? Something about one of the horses, I assume.”

 

“Actually, I really just wanted to see you.” I explained. “But we might as well go see the horses, since we’re here.” 

 

“Alright. Let’s go then.” He led me to the stables with a smile. 

 

We made small talk as we checked on the horses. It was nice to be out at the stables again, away from everything. 

 

We went out for dinner after we were done, then back to his flat. I really did want to talk to him about what had been going on. Or at least warn him about Elizabeth Leviathan, in case she came out. 

 

He sat down on the couch and I cuddled up next to him. 

 

“Porchey, can I talk to you about something?” I asked him.

 

“Of course. What’s wrong?” 

 

“You know that I’ve been struggling ever since I became queen with the two Elizabeths.” I explained. “How I’ve felt like Elizabeth Regina is killing Elizabeth Windsor. But now a third Elizabeth has developed. I decided to call her Elizabeth Leviathan. She’s kind of insane, really. She makes me do things I never thought I would.”

 

“How long has this been going on?”

 

“Several months.” 

 

“What exactly has she made you do?” He asked.

 

“I’ve slept with several men, done drugs, and beat the shit out of a woman I caught sleeping with my husband.” I confessed.

 

“So Philip is cheating on you?” He had known about my suspicions, but I had never told him they had been confirmed.

 

“Yes. In fact, finding that out is really how this whole thing started.” 

 

“And you feel like this new Elizabeth is taking over you?” I nodded.

 

“That’s the real reason I asked to see you.” I told him. “You’ve always been able to bring Elizabeth Windsor back to the surface, and I was hoping you still could.”

 

“I’ll always be willing to try. I’d do anything for you.” He said sweetly. “I love you. I always have and I always will, no matter how many of you there are.” 

 

“I love you too.” I gave him a small smile. 

 

Porchey kissed me and I returned it. I expected Elizabeth Leviathan to come out the moment my lips latched onto his, but she didn’t. I didn’t pull away, though. 

 

We made out, but it stayed soft and loving. It wasn’t the rough, desperate kiss I’d had with the other men. His hands made their way to the buttons at the top of my blouse. He paused for a moment.

 

“Is it alright if I do this?” He asked. I nodded. “Are you sure this is what you want?” 

 

“Yes.” 

 

We undressed each other as we continued to make out. 

 

“Why don’t we go to the bedroom?” He suggested when we were naked. I nodded and he took my hand. 

 

I laid down on the bed and he crawled on top of me. He kissed me on the lips again, then made his way down my body. His hands caressed me gently as he kissed me. I moaned softly. 

 

“Porchey,” 

 

Slowly, his lips made their way back up to mine. 

 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” He asked. I smiled.

 

“Of course.” He kissed me again. 

 

We made love. It felt amazing. When I had sex with Martin, it had been all passion and lust. With Porchey, there was still passion, but it came through in love instead. 

 

When we finished, he rolled off me. He stayed laying next to me and I crawled into his arms.

 

“I love you.” I breathed. 

 

“I love you too.”

 

It was strange to hear myself telling Porchey I loved him. Especially strange considering I really felt like I meant it. 

 

I felt strange for another reason too. Until now, every time I had cheated on Philip, I had been Elizabeth Leviathan. But this time, I was still Elizabeth Windsor. Why? I thought about it for a moment, and realized it was because I really did love him. Maybe because Philip had abandoned me. Maybe because Porchey actually treated me well. Maybe both. 

 

As I laid there thinking, I came to a realization. Elizabeth Windsor had married Philip because she thought she loved him more than Porchey. By the time she realized she was wrong, she was already Elizabeth Regina. Elizabeth Regina didn’t really love Philip, she couldn’t love anybody, but she completely relied on him as her consort. Then came Elizabeth Leviathan, who would sleep with anyone who could help her get what she wanted, but she seemed especially attached to Martin. Why? I wasn’t sure. Perhaps it was an escape for both of us from the strict expectations of our jobs. 

 

In any case, I had three personalities, and a man for each of them. It didn’t make any sense, but it also made perfect sense. 

 

I pushed my thoughts away. I reached up to Porchey and kissed him again. 

 

“Goodnight.” I whispered.

 

“Goodnight Lilibet.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much more to come, my lovely readers. Stay tuned! :)


	9. Suspicions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a little longer than the last few chapters, but I hope you like it! :)

A week had passed since I met up with Porchey. I had met up with him a few times since. Every time it had ended in sex, but Elizabeth Leviathan still hadn’t come out around him.

But around other people, that was a different story.

I was sitting in my office when I heard a knock on the door.

“Come in.” I called. Martin Charteris opened the door and walked in. “Martin? What brings you here?”

“I came to see you, Elizabeth.” I smiled. I knew exactly what he was here for.

I walked across the room to him and kissed him. We undressed each other as we made out, and slowly made our way to the couch. I pushed him down and climbed on top of him.

When we finished, I laid on top of him and rested my head on his chest. I gave him another kiss.

“You’re always welcome in here, anytime you like.” I told him.

“Good. Because I’d like to be here all the time.” He replied.

Later that afternoon, I met Porchey at the stables. This time, we really were there for business. We were going to discuss one of our horses, Aureal, who had been invited to a race in America.

When I brought up the race, I was expecting Porchey to immediately agree, but he didn’t. Instead, he told me it would be better to retire Aureal.

“I’m surprised to hear you turn down a trip to America.” I commented. “That’s where your girlfriend lives.”

“Fiancée.” He corrected. I raised my eyebrows.

“Fiancée?” I hadn’t realized they were that serious.

I should’ve been happy for him, but I wasn’t. I was hurt, and he could tell.

“Is that a problem?”

“I just, I,” I wasn’t sure how to word how I felt. I sighed. “I thought you loved me.”

“I do. But I can’t marry you.” He put his hand on my shoulder, but I backed away. “You could’ve married me, but you decided you loved Philip instead. So don’t get mad at me because I won’t stay a bachelor forever. Get mad at your own damn self for choosing that jackass over me.”

Something snapped inside me when he said that. Porchey hadn’t met the devil yet, but he was about to.

I kneed him in the groin then punched him in the face. He tried to hit me back, but I caught his arms and used his momentum to push him to the ground. I started punching him again and again. He tried to stop me, but wouldn’t actually hit me back. I could tell he didn’t want to fight me.

“Lilibet, stop.” He finally grabbed my arms. I froze. And just as quickly as the devil had come out, she was gone again.

“I’m sorry.” I told him, bursting into tears.

“It’s okay.” He told me. I laid down on top of him and he held me against his chest. “Was that Elizabeth Leviathan?” He asked me.

“Yes.” I replied.

I laid there for awhile, crying into his chest.

“I really do love you.” He told me.

“I know.” I gave him a kiss. “I love you too.”

That night, when I got back to the palace, Philip was in my room waiting for me.

“Philip,” I greeted him. “What are you doing here?”

“Where the hell have you been?” He asked me, angrily.

“Out at the stables.” I answered.

“Why?” He demanded.

“For business. To discuss the horses.”

“With whom?”

“Porchey.”

“And you really expect me to believe you were just there on business?” He questioned.

“Yes.” I insisted. It was half-true. I really had gone there on business matters, we just hadn’t ended up discussing much business.

“And where have you been all week?” He pressed. “Hell, where have you been going for the past several months? You never used to be gone in the evenings, now you’re gone all the time.”

“I’m surprised you even noticed.” I retorted. “You’ve hardly been here for years.”

“Jesus Christ, not this again. I’m not cheating on you. I think the real question here is are you cheating on me?”

“No.” I denied. This was a flat out lie, but he could never know that.

“Then where the hell have you been?”

“With friends.” I told him. “I need someone to spend my time with, since I don’t have you. I’ll go insane if I spend every night here alone.”

There was an irony to that lie. I was going insane even with plenty of company.

“What kind of friends? And what are you doing with them?”

“They’re all just friends!” I yelled, losing my temper. “And I’m not fucking doing anything!”

“Bullshit.”

“Get out!” I screamed. “Get the fuck out!”

Philip stared at me for a moment, stunned. But he left without another word.

I continued to see Porchey most days. And Philip continued getting suspicious. But he also continued going out every night and coming home drunk in the early hours of the morning. So I sure as hell wasn’t about to stop having my own fun. I had even gotten Porchey a direct line, so he could call straight into me without having to deal with all the telephone operators. 

A week had passed since my fight with Philip. Aureal’s first breeding was today, and I decided to take Philip with me. I thought letting him see Porchey and me together might help dispel his suspicions.

Martin happened to stop by my office that morning too. We had sex, and a short conversation, then he left.

Unfortunately, as he was leaving, Philip was arriving to meet me in my office. I was already dressed, but I still looked a little messy.

“What was Martin doing in here?” Philip demanded, shutting the door behind him.

“We were just talking.” I replied calmly.

“Then why does he look so disheveled?”

“I don’t know.” I shrugged. “Maybe he woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”

“And you coincidentally happened to also wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?” He raised an eyebrow. “Because you also look pretty disheveled.”

“Philip, nothing happened.” I insisted.

“Bullshit.”

“Nothing happened!” I yelled. He sighed and shook his head.

“Whatever.” He rolled his eyes. “Let’s go.”

I followed him out to the car in silence. We didn’t say anything to each other during the ride out to the stables.

Porchey greeted us as we got out of the car. He was smiling, but he looked wary. It must’ve been obvious that Philip and I weren’t happy.

“Hello, Elizabeth.” He told me, trying not to sound too personal. “I’m glad you’ve decided to join us Philip.”

Porchey didn’t talk much about Philip, and I never talked to him about Philip’s suspicions, but evidently, I didn’t need to. I could tell by how he was acting that he already thought Philip might be suspicious of him.

During the breeding, I stood by Philip, while Porchey was on the other side of the room. Philip kept giving him dirty looks.

“I hear he’s been given a direct line.” He commented. “So he can call straight in.”

“Yes.”

“I tried to get one for Mike and was denied on him not being a member of the family.”

“Porchey is like family.” I replied.

“No he’s not.” He retorted. “He’s your fuck buddy.”

“He is not!” I insisted, a little too loudly. A few people turned to look at us, Porchey included. Neither of us said anything else.

As soon as the breeding was done, Philip stormed out of the stables and headed back to the car. Porchey walked across the room to talk to me.

“Lilibet, is everything alright?” He asked.

“It’s fine.”

“Don’t lie to me. What’s wrong?”

“I don’t want to talk about it right now. I’ll call you later, okay?”

“Alright.” He reached for my hand and squeezed it. “I love you.” He whispered.

“I love you too.”

I left and joined Philip in the car. We sat there in stony silence for a moment, until Philip finally spoke.

“Elizabeth, what the hell is going on?”

“Nothing!”

“I know it’s not nothing.” He snapped. “So why don’t you just tell me the truth?”

“There’s nothing going’s on!”

“Tell me the fucking truth!”

“I am!” I insisted.

“No you’re not. Because I know the truth. You’re a fucking slag!”

“How dare you? You’re the one who’s been cheating!” I had resisted going there in our previous arguments, but I finally had to.

For a moment, he sat there in silence.

“Fuck you.” He finally muttered. He stormed out of the car.

That evening, we had to go to a dinner for Winston. He was finally retiring and we were having a dinner at Downing Street to honor him.

Before Philip and I left, I decided to talk to him. I had to. I had to put an end to his suspicions. He could never know what was really going on.

“Can you leave us now?” I asked my dresser as she finished helping me put on my jewelry. She nodded and left the room.

It was just Philip and I now. I took a deep breath and started talking.

“Porchey is a friend.” I began. “And yes, there are those who would’ve preferred me to marry him. Indeed marriage with him might have been easier, might have even worked better than ours. But to everyone’s regret and frustration, the only person I have ever loved is you. And can you honestly look me in the eyes and say the same?” He didn’t respond. “Can you?”

He never said anything. He just looked down sadly and guiltily. I walked away. Almost everything I had just said was a lie. Porchey was not just a friend. And Philip was not the only person I had ever loved. But it looked like he believed it. And at that moment, that was all that mattered. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will finish off season 1. Stay tuned! :)


	10. What Have I Done?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is quite a bit longer than the previous chapters, but it finishes off season 1 in the timeline of the show.
> 
> Fair warning, some of the sex scenes in this are a little more graphic than what I usually write. I don't know why. Maybe I'm just getting a little bolder. Anyway, enjoy!

My relationship with Philip had gotten worse over the last few weeks, to put it lightly. So much so, that I had agreed to send him away to open the Olympics in Australia.

 

It had been my mother’s idea. She thought he would enjoy the attention. Might come back happier and more mature. Finally ready to settle down and be my consort. 

 

It was well intentioned, but it wouldn’t help. Because what my mother didn’t know was that I was playing just as big a role in destroying my marriage as Philip. I had committed just as many sins, even if I claimed they were in revenge. Maybe it started out that way, but now, for the most part, I was doing it for my own pleasure. I enjoyed having a secret life away from the courts and the scrutiny. A life very few knew about. 

 

I sat in my office, bored. I wanted to leave. I was sick of reading government papers. I would much rather be off somewhere getting fucked. Elizabeth Leviathan was itching to be let out. 

 

Lucky for me, there was a knock at the door.

 

“Come in.” 

 

It was Martin. I smiled, hoping he was there for the reason I thought he was.

 

“Martin.” I greeted him. “What brings you here?”  

 

He shut the door behind him.

 

“I was just sitting in my office with nothing to do, and I suddenly found myself in the mood to come visit you.” He smirked. “Elizabeth.” 

 

He walked over to me and I stood up to meet him. He kissed me hard. I pushed him onto the chair and climbed in his lap. 

 

We took each other’s clothes off desperately as we made out. He undressed me down to my panties and I was able to get all but his pants off. Martin slid my panties down and started rubbing me. I moaned. He slid one finger inside me, then a second. I moaned louder and bit down on his lip. 

 

I soon became lost in pleasure as he fingered me. Suddenly, he stopped. 

 

“Martin,” I whined. 

 

“Don’t worry. I’m not done with you yet.”

 

He kissed me again as he picked me up and set me down on my desk. I took off his pants and underwear and he took my panties all the way off. I wrapped my legs around him as he entered me. I moaned into his mouth as we kissed. 

 

His lips wandered down to my neck. He kissed and bit his way down my neck and my chest. 

 

“Fuck,” I moaned as he swirled his tongue over my nipple. His lips made his way to my other breast, then back up to my neck. My moans were getting louder and my eyes rolled back. I was completely lost.

 

His lips met mine again as we reached orgasm. I screamed in pleasure as I finished. 

 

When we were done, I laid back on my desk. I smiled up at him. 

 

“You’re amazing.” I told him. He leaned down and kissed me. 

 

“You’re not half bad yourself.”

 

*****

 

The next day, I was supposed to have lunch with Margaret. I wasn’t looking forward to it. Peter had returned home after waiting two years, but Margaret still couldn’t marry him without giving up her title and position in the family. I so badly wanted her to be able to marry him. He was a good man and I could tell that he really loved her. I didn’t want to have to tell her she still couldn’t have him. But I had to. 

 

Margaret arrived at noon. She was on time for once, though this was perhaps the one time I wished she wouldn’t be. 

 

“Hello, Margaret.” I greeted her as she sat down across from me. 

 

“Hello, Lilibet.” She replied. 

 

“I need to talk to you about Peter.” I told her, getting straight to the point. “I have news.”

 

“Good news I hope.”

 

“I’m afraid not.” I sighed. “It appears there is a second part to the Royal Marriages Act that no one told me about before. As it turns out, turning 25 only gives you the freedom to declare your intent to marry. You still need Cabinet permission to marry Peter.”

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

 

“I wish I was.”

 

“Peter and I waited two years in separate countries to make things easier for you.” She snapped. “We did everything we were asked and now you’re telling us we still can’t marry?”

 

“You can still marry Peter, however, it would require you to renounce your royal titles and your place in the royal family.” 

 

“Well if that’s the choice you’re giving me I know what my decision will be.” She replied angrily. “I know you think I can’t live without the titles and the help and the attention but I can. I can survive just fine on my own.”

 

“Margaret, that isn’t what I want for you. Please, just think about it.”

 

“I will.” She stood up and waked around the table to me. “And while I’m thinking about that, perhaps you can think about this.”

 

She slapped me in the face and pulled me out of my chair. She threw me on the ground and climbed on top of me. She punched me in the face. She went for a second punch, but I grabbed her arm and twisted it back. I threw her off me. She attacked me again, but this time, I was ready for it. I pushed her to the ground. She scratched me and flipped us over, pulling me by the hair. We ended up rolling on the floor, scratching, hitting, biting, and pulling each other’s hair. 

 

Suddenly, the door opened. The footmen had come to collect our plates. They were still on the table, the food on them hardly touched. Margaret got up and left, shooting me a death glare as she walked out the door. I got up with what was left of my dignity and went up to my room. 

 

That evening, I sat in my room alone, contemplating what had just happened with Margaret. Suddenly, the phone rang, snapping me out of my thoughts.

 

“Hello?” I answered.

 

“Lilibet,” It was Porchey. I hadn’t gotten to see him the last few weeks. His fiancée was visiting from America and he didn’t want her to find out about his affair with me. 

 

“Porchey,” I replied. “What a lovely surprise. What do you want?”

 

“I want to see you.” He explained. “Jeanie left this morning. She’s on her way back to America.”

 

“Good.” I smiled. “What time do you want me to come over?”

 

“As soon as you can be.”

 

“I’ll be there in twenty minutes.” 

 

“Great.” 

 

I went to my vanity and fixed my hair and makeup, which had gotten messed up during my fight with Margaret. I wanted to look nice to see him again. 

 

I knocked on the door to his flat. He answered almost immediately.

 

“Lilibet,” he pulled me inside and shut the door behind me. He pushed me against the wall and kissed me desperately. “I missed you.” He told me breathlessly.

 

“I missed you too.” I smiled up at him. “So how have you been?”

 

“We can talk later.” Porchey kissed me again, then picked me up and carried me to the bedroom. I giggled. 

 

He laid me down on his bed. We undressed each other as we made out. When we were naked, he flipped us over so I was on top. 

 

“You know, I had something special in mind for you.” He told me. 

 

“Oh?”

 

“Come here.” He took my hand and helped me reposition so I was sitting on his face. 

 

The moment I felt his tongue on me, I was lost. He started slow, but gradually got more intense. He knew exactly how, and exactly where, I wanted it. 

 

“Fuck,” I moaned as his tongue briefly entered me. I dug my fingers in his hair as my eyes rolled back. My moans got louder as he continued to work his magic on me. He paused for a moment.

 

“God I love seeing you like this.” He told me. I gasped when he started again.

 

“Porchey,” I moaned. It didn’t take much longer for him to finish me off. 

 

I laid down on top of him, breathless. 

 

“I love you.” I told him.

 

“I love you too.”

 

We started making out again. When my tongue entered his mouth, I tasted myself on him. 

 

As much as I could tell he enjoyed pleasing me, I could tell he needed something himself. Lucky for him, I was more than ready for a second round.

 

I repositioned myself again, this time lowering myself onto him. He moaned. I leaned back down to kiss him again. 

 

I felt so connected to him as we made love. It was an incredible feeling. 

 

When we finished I laid down beside him and he took me in his arms. We talked for a few hours before falling asleep. It felt so good to fall asleep in his arms again. I really had missed him.

 

*****

 

The next night, I was alone again. I decided to go out to a pub. This was something I hardly ever did, but I was bored. I was a little nervous about going alone, but I went anyway. I put on a red dress that tight fitting and much more revealing than what I usually wore and put on a matching lipstick before heading out. 

 

I sat down at the bar and ordered a whiskey. I felt awkward sitting at the bar alone. But suddenly, someone sat down next to me. 

 

“Hello,” An unfamiliar voice greeted me. 

 

I turned my head. It was a young woman, who looked a few years younger than me. She had long, flowing red hair and stunning green eyes. She was absolutely beautiful. When I looked at her, I felt something I’d never felt looking at another woman before. Or perhaps I had, and Elizabeth Windsor had just ignored it. But Elizabeth Leviathan wasn’t going to.

 

“Hello,” I replied. “What’s your name?” I asked her.

 

“Elsie,” she told me. “Elsie Brooks. What’s your name.”

 

“Liz.” I replied. “Liz Stewart.” I made up a last name. She didn’t seem to recognize me, but the last name Windsor would give me away for sure. “Can I buy you a drink?” I offered.

 

“Sure.”

 

“What would you like?”

 

“Whatever. I don’t care.” 

 

I ordered her a whiskey. We talked and flirted for a bit. She made it very clear that she was attracted to me in the same way I was her. 

 

“Wanna dance?” She asked after a while.

 

“Of course.” 

 

I took her hand and led her out to the floor. We were the only same sex couple on the dance floor. A few people gave us weird looks, but we didn’t care. We danced and flirted like no one was watching.

 

Suddenly, she leaned in and kissed me. I kissed back. I had never kissed a woman before, but I enjoyed it. We made out on the dance floor for a few minutes before Elsie pulled away. 

 

“Why don’t we take this somewhere more private?” She suggested. 

 

“Where?” I knew what she was suggesting, but as much as I wanted it, I couldn’t take her home. 

 

“We could go to the bathroom for all I care.” She quickly reached a hand under my dress and rubbed me over my panties. “I just want you.” 

 

“Let’s go then.” I moaned. 

 

We made our way off the crowded dance floor and to the bathroom, shutting the door behind us. Elsie slammed me against the wall and kissed me again. We undressed each other desperately as we made out. I had never had sex with another woman before, but I was excited. 

 

She propped up one of my legs and started rubbing me. I moaned and leaned my head back. I reached down and started rubbing her as well. She moaned in surprise. Our lips met again and we sank to the floor. She laid me down and crawled on top of me.

 

She started grinding against my leg and I instinctively started grinding against hers. My eyes rolled back. It felt so damn good. She leaned down and kissed and bit on my neck and chest, adding more hickies among the ones Martin had given me a few days ago. 

 

“Elsie,” I moaned her name.

 

“You like that, don’t you?” She whispered in my ear. She pressed against me harder, sending me over the edge. I pulled her against me as she kissed my neck, leaving scratches on her back. 

 

Her lips met mine again as we reached orgasm. For a moment, I laid there breathless. 

 

“That was amazing.” I remarked.

 

“I’m glad you liked it.” She said sexily. “Because I’m not done with you yet.” 

 

I had thought we were done, but her voice turned me on again. She began rubbing me as she made out with me again. She turned us over so we were on our sides. With her free hand, she took mine and put it between her legs. 

 

“Just mirror my movements.” She instructed. 

 

I touched her like she was touching me. When she put one finger inside me, I put one finger inside her, and when she added a second, I did the same. We were both quickly lost in pleasure, and our moans filled the air as we fingered each other. 

 

When we finished, we laid there exhausted for a few minutes. 

 

“We should probably get going.” Elsie said. “Someone will probably need to use the bathroom soon.”

 

We got dressed and left the pub. We got in separate cars and drove off in different directions. As I made my way back to the palace, I wondered if I would ever see Elsie again. I hoped I would, but deep down, I knew I wouldn’t. It was a disappointing realization. But I didn’t regret what I had done. If anything, I learned that I should fuck women more often. 

 

*****

 

The next morning, I ran into Philip in the hallway. I was walking back to my room from breakfast. Philip seemed hungover. I wasn’t surprised. He almost always was these days. 

 

“Good morning,” I greeted him. He didn’t even look in my direction. He just kept walking. 

 

I almost went back to my room. But for some reason, I didn’t. I went into Philip’s. It was a mess. The bed was unmade; it looked like he’d just rolled out of it. He probably had. 

 

I turned around to leave. Why had I even come in here? But as I walked past the bed again, I happened to look down at the floor. And I saw a pair of women’s panties that sure as hell weren’t mine. I picked them up.

 

Right at that moment, Philip stumbled back in. I didn’t give him the chance to say anything first.

 

“Whose are these?” I demanded. 

 

“None of your business.” He snapped.

 

“On the contrary, it most certainly is my business.” I argued. “You seem to have forgotten this, but I am your wife.”

 

“You seem to have forgotten that too.” He walked back out. 

 

I didn’t have time to dwell on the fight. I was getting my official portrait done today. I had to meet Cecil Beaton in the throne room in a couple hours. 

 

As I stood in the throne room, with Bobo adjusting my dress and jewelry, and Cecil rambling on about what he had envisioned for my portrait, Philip walked in. He was all dressed up.

 

“Where are you off to?” I asked.

 

“I have to go to a meeting with the Olympic Committee.” He told me. “The trip is now being extended to a tour of the Commonwealth. I’ll be away even longer. Five months. Away from you. Away from the children.”

 

I had mixed emotions about the extension on the trip. On one hand, the time away from him might be good for both of us. On the other hand, I wasn’t sure how I could bear being away from him for so long. At the end of the day, no matter how much we both fucked up, we still loved each other. And we still needed each other.

 

“Have you ever considered that this might be good for you?” I suggested, trying to put a positive spin on it. “You might benefit from the attention. You might even enjoy yourself. Everyone’s just trying to do what’s best for you.”

 

“Don’t dress betrayal up as a favor.” He spat. “I’ve got to go. Can’t stand around chatting.”

 

He walked away.

 

“Will you be back later?” I called after him. He didn’t respond. Didn’t even acknowledge I had spoken. He just kept walking.

 

But I couldn’t stand there and mope or go chase after him. I had a portrait to take.

 

“All hail sage Lady, whom a grateful Isle hath blessed.” Cecil said as he took my picture. “Not moving, not breathing. Our very own goddess. Glorious Gloriana. Forgetting Elizabeth Windsor now. Now only Elizabeth Regina.”

 

Glorious Gloriana. A goddess. I sure didn’t feel like one. Nor did I act like one. I had fucked everything up. My marriage was a disaster. I was cheating on him with several different people. Everyone hated me. And it seemed everyday the mess I had gotten myself into got more complicated. I was supposed to be a perfect image. A statue. A goddess. Not thinking, just existing. But all I could do was think. And all I could do was wonder, what the hell had I done? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took forever to get this up. But I'm on Christmas break now and will have much more time for writing. Hopefully the next chapter will be up soon. I have so much planned for season 2. Stay tuned!


	11. The Ballerina

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New year, new drama! Hope you like it! :)

Philip had just left for his five month tour. I almost didn’t care. Until yesterday, I thought I would miss him. We had been doing much better. He wasn’t going out all the time and I had stopped seeing Martin and Porchey. But then I found a picture of another woman in his briefcase. And I remembered why we had stopped getting along in the first place. 

 

The woman in the picture was Galina Ulanova, a famous ballerina. She happened to be starring in the ballet I had to go to the next night. I wasn’t looking forward to it. This seemed like a situation that would finally bring Elizabeth Leviathan back out, and I wasn’t sure if she would fight her or fuck her. 

 

That night, I watched Galina’s performance in silence. I swore she made eye contact with me more than once from the stage. I clapped politely when the ballet was over, but I stayed seated when the rest of the audience stood gave her a standing ovation.

 

“We wondered if Her Majesty might like to meet Miss Ulanova,” Michael Adeane said quietly in my ear.

 

I almost said no. And I probably should have. But anger and bitterness clouded my judgement.

 

“Of course.” I replied. 

 

Michael led me backstage to where I was supposed to meet her. I almost froze when I saw her. There she was. The woman in the picture was standing in front of me. 

 

“Your Majesty, this is Miss Galina Ulanova,” Michael said, snapping me out of my thoughts. She curtsied.

 

“A pleasure to meet you, Your Majesty.” Galina said, seeming nervous. 

 

“Likewise.” I forced a smile. “You gave a lovely performance tonight.” 

 

“Thank you.” 

 

“Miss Ulanova, I know this is not customary, but I would like to have a word with you in private.” I told her.

 

“Ma’am,” Michael tried to interject, but I stopped him.

 

“It will only take a minute Michael.”

 

“My dressing room is just down the hall if you would like to talk there.” She suggested, looking even more nervous. I got the feeling she knew that I knew. 

 

“Perfect.” I agreed. “Michael, wait here.”

 

“Of course, Your Majesty.” He nodded, seeming confused. 

 

Galina led me to her dressing room and closed the door behind us. 

 

“Miss Ulanova, I know I am not the first member of the Royal Family you have performed for.” I began. “I know that you gave an entirely different kind of performance to my husband.”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She replied awkwardly. I knew she was lying. 

 

“I think you do, but if I must elaborate, I will. You slept with my husband.”

 

“N-no, no, of course not.”

 

“Then where’d he get this?” I reached in my clutch and took out the picture of her. She gasped.

 

“I-I have no idea.” She was clearly lying, but she was also clearly not going to confess so easily. But I wasn’t leaving until she did. I smirked. 

 

“Of course you do.” My voice got lower and my demeanor changed as cupped her face in my hand. I ran my hand down her neck and arm. “You met Philip through one of his sleazy friends.” My hand lowered to go up her tutu. I rubbed her through her clothes. A moan escaped her lips. “He touched you.” I started pulling her costume off her. “He kissed you.” I kissed her and she kissed back. “He made love to you.” I said against her lips. “Didn’t he?”

 

“Yes.” She confessed. Her costume fell to the floor. 

 

“You met more than once, several times actually.” I kept going, continuing to rub her through her tights. Then, I pulled them down. “And before he left, you gave him a picture to remember you by.”

 

“Yes.” My fingers entered her and she moaned again. “Fuck.”

 

“You like that?” I kissed her again.

 

“Yes.” Her hands found her way to the zipper on my dress and undressed me. We sank to the floor and fingered each other as we made out. 

 

When we finished, we put our clothes back on. I had to get back to Michael. He was probably getting concerned. Before I left, I stopped at the door and turned around.

 

“Who fucked you better?” I asked her. Galina smiled.

 

“You.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed my first chapter of 2019. Thanks for reading!
> 
> Also, if you like the movie The Greatest Showman, I'm writing a fanfic for that too. It's called Two Lost Dreamers. It;s about P.T. and Jenny Lind. You should check it out! :)


	12. Favor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's pretty short, but enjoy! :)

The next week was interesting to say the least. And not in a good way. Mike Parker’s wife, Eileen, had found out about the Thursday Club. She knew everything. And she wanted to get a divorce. 

 

That would ruin Mike’s career in royal service. I didn’t have a problem with that. He was a cheating asshole and he deserved it. And he deserved for Eileen to kick him to the curb. My problem was that it would implicate Philip as well. And if this story made its way to the papers, the public would find out everything Mike and Philip were up to with the Thursday Club. It would be a massive scandal. 

 

And if that scandal was found out, someone could leak to the papers about what I’d been doing. That could be a scandal like the royal family had never seen before. It could ruin every shred of credibility and respectability we had. This scandal could snowball out of control very fast. It could truly ruin the royal family forever. 

 

We had to stop the scandal before it started. We had to prevent it. I liked Eileen. I had considered her a friend. But I couldn’t let her do this. As much as I wished I could, I could not let her divorce Mike. 

 

I got out of the car and walked up to Eileen’s house. I was outwardly calm, but I was inwardly very nervous. I silently prayed I could keep Elizabeth Leviathan at bay during this visit. Going insane was not going to convince her to do me a favor. Well, I supposed it could, but that would be the last resort. Hopefully, this could be done peacefully.

 

I knocked on the door, and she answered almost immediately.

 

“Your Majesty,” she looked surprised. It always disappointed me a little when she talked to me so formally. We used to be actual friends, but that was before I became queen. “What are you doing here?”

 

“We need to talk.” I told her. She still looked confused, but she smiled.

 

“Of course. Come inside.” Eileen led me to her sitting room. I sat down while she went to the kitchen to put on tea. When she came back, she sat down across from me. “So, what did you need to talk about?”

 

“I heard a rumor that you are planning to sue your husband for divorce.” I got straight to the point. I hated doing this. I wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. 

 

“Yes, I am.” She confirmed. “And I have the grounds to do it. I have proof that Mike has been unfaithful. And that he has effectively abandoned me and our children.”

 

“What proof do you have?” I questioned. I had proof of my own, but I wanted to know what exactly she had. And how badly it implicated Philip. 

 

“This letter.” She reached into her purse and took out an envelope. “From Mike to the Thursday Club.” She handed me the letter. 

 

“How did you get this?” I asked, shocked. The Thursday Club was extremely secretive. They would certainly never let a letter from a member fall into the hands of his wife. 

 

“A waitress who works at the pub they go to.” Eileen explained. “She stole it from a table when no one was looking. It was read out loud to the entire club.”

 

I opened the envelope and took out the letter. I struggled to keep my composure as I read it. It was bad. Mike was openly discussing the various affairs he and the other men on the ship were having. And even though the letter never mentioned Philip by name, it certainly implicated him. 

 

“Disgusting, isn’t it?” She remarked. “They think they can do this to us and get away with it. Well they won’t. We deserve more respect than this.”

 

I wanted to cry, but I held myself together. 

 

“We do.” I agreed quietly.

 

“I have to leave Mike.” She said, determinedly. 

 

“Eileen, I really hate to do this to you. I know what you’re going through. And I would love to see you kick Mike to the curb, but you can’t do this.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“I cannot afford to have this scandal right now.” I sighed. “This will implicate Philip as well, and a scandal like this could ruin the royal family.”

 

“Well, what am I supposed to do? Put up with this humiliation and disrespect as yet another favor to you?” She retorted. “My entire adult life has been a favor to you people and I’m sick of it.”

 

“Do you think I enjoy this life?” I spat back. “Before you get mad at me, remember that you have the option to leave your husband. I don’t. You’re the lucky one here. I can sit here and beg you not to do this until I’m blue in the face, but I can’t actually stop you. All I can do is ask you not to do this. I would love to see you leave Mike. I would love to leave Philip. But I can’t. And I can’t afford the scandal you leaving Mike would bring. Don’t think of it as another favor to the crown, think of it as a favor to an old friend. You and Mike can live entirely separate lives, but please, do not divorce him.”

 

“We already do live separate lives. I can’t take it anymore.” She sighed. 

 

“Please, just think about what I’ve said.” I begged, one last time. “Please, think about the consequences your actions could bring. Please, think about this.”

 

Eileen sighed.

 

“Fine. I’ll think about it.” She agreed.

 

“Thank you.”

 

Before I left, we shared a sad hug. At the end of the day, we were both going through the same thing. We both had selfish, cheating pricks for husbands. And we both knew the kind of pain they caused. 

 

*****

 

Another week had passed. And things hadn’t gotten better. On the contrary, they’d gotten worse. Much worse. Eileen had formally announced her divorce. Well, her lawyer had confirmed that his client was suing her husband for divorce. Apparently, Eileen had not really meant it when she said she’d reconsider. Or she had thought about it and didn’t change her mind.

 

On one hand, I understood. She had the option to leave her cheating husband and she should use it. She could escape. But I couldn’t. And on the other hand, I had a mix of jealousy and resentment. I was jealous that I couldn’t make the same choice. And I resented the scandal her choice would create.

 

Even though I understood exactly why she was doing this, I was angry at her. And Elizabeth Leviathan had stayed calm for too long. She was itching to be let out again. And I knew there was no way Elizabeth Regina or Elizabeth Windsor could stop her.

 

I got out of the car, once again at her house. This time, the confrontation would be far less friendly. She viewed divorcing Mike as something she had to do. Well, this was something I had to do in return. She was going to do everything in her power to make sure Philip was not implicated in this and I was going to make sure of that. 

 

I knocked on the door. This time, she waited a minute before opening the door.

 

“Your Majesty, I am so sorry.” Eileen told me. “But I just cannot go on living like this. I have to divorce Mike or I will never be happy.”

 

“Eileen, is it alright if I come in?” I wanted to get this done and over with, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to do it outside in full view of the public. 

 

“Of course.” 

 

She led me to the sitting room, but this time, I didn’t sit down. 

 

“I can’t stop you from divorcing Mike.” I began. “But I can and will stop you from implicating that Philip had anything to do this.”

 

“I can’t lie to everybody like that.” She shook her head. “My only real evidence is that letter, and that will have to be shown in court. I can’t help it if Philip is implicated in this as well. And it’s not like he wouldn’t be getting what he deserved.”

 

“Eileen, this could destroy the royal family.” I argued. “I cannot afford to have this scandal so soon after the whole Margaret and Peter mess.”

 

“Public opinion will bounce back from this, just like it did after that.” She tried to reassure me. But there was no convincing me. This scandal had to be stopped before it started. There was no way around it.

 

“It might.” I replied. “But it might not. And that’s not a risk I can afford to take.”

 

“I’m sorry.” She shook her head. “I don’t to do this to you, but I will not stay with Mike just to spare your blushes.”

 

“I’m not asking you to.” I snapped back. “I’m just asking that you keep Philip out of this.”

 

“I can’t do that. I-,” I cut her off with a slap to the face, then pushed her against the wall. 

 

“You can and will.” I growled. “You will tell the press that Philip had nothing to do with this. And if they ask you about him, you will deny everything. Or else.”

 

“Or else what?” She snapped, pushing me off her and throwing me to the ground. She got on top of me and tried to punch me, but I caught her fist. I pushed her off and rolled on top of her. 

 

“You don’t want to find out.” 

 

I got off of her and walked out, leaving her stunned on the sitting room floor. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it takes me so long to update this. But I'll have more soonish, so stay tuned. Thanks for reading! :)


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